Next steps in my Journey

** Warning ** Some of this content is graphic. It may have trigger issues for some. Please read this story only if you are in a good place emotionally.

I have had this blog for more than 4 years now.  I appreciate each and every one of you that have come here, shared comments, experiences and support.  I look forward to continuing my writing here but now feel it’s time to spread my wings.  Connecting with people and discussing some of the many issues here and  in person is becoming increasingly important to me.  I see myself working through the subjects of healing and forgiveness after sexual abuse or trauma.  I also some heavier work around the topics of orgasm experienced in traumatic sexual experiences.

I believe that this subject of orgasm in abusive situations is not discussed enough and this blog has become a safe place to come to and share issues and experiences.  The emotional conflicts between guilt, shame and trauma versus the intense pleasure that can happen if an orgasm happens during a sexually abusive situation need to be discussed.  The reason I feel this is important is that there are too many suffering with this inner turmoil in silence. If talking about this issue became easier, victims may feel more confident to report offenders.  It’s also a goal of mine to live in a society that supports the victims and are wiling to advocate for them instead of quietly trying to get them to “move on”.  If a victim has an orgasm during any sort of sexual abuse, that is not consent. That does not make it any less of a crime.  We are talking biology here.  The body responds to specific stimulation and a specific result happens. Survivors of sexual trauma can be more forgiving of themselves and respect the fact that they did NOTHING wrong.  The orgasm doesn’t change that. The pleasure from that orgasm, while shocking, embarrassing or confusing is not be ignored.  It should be acknowledged, talked about and released. I would like to be part of the discussions that help people through this process.

I invite all here to help me  with this goal by suggesting ways that I could expand what I do here.  Would people want to hear me speak on stage? on tv? in workshops? sharing circles? online webinars or conference calls? YouTube videos?  I read all your comments here, on Twitter and on Facebook. I appreciate them all more than you know. If you have suggestions or more topic ideas, I would love to hear them.