Stop Compromising

I have been processing some major energy shifts lately in the past few months. It’s left me feeling ungrounded and more than a little scatterbrained and exhausted. I’m trying to work with the flow of all this. I know I’ll end up in a much better place but there are moments when this push towards where I’m supposed to be can be painful.

I’ve been letting go of expectations and enjoying the moment more. I’ve been much more willing to see my flaws and able to observe them without all the judgement on myself. My energy has been moving to a place of openness with everyone around me. That has meant that I have been much less filtered and even less willing to apologize for it. I feel that if I’m being authentic there is nothing to apologize for. I have spent so much of my life trying to keep everyone else happy. I’ve compromised to a point that I ignore my own spirit. I get compromise for family, marriage, career, but I’m pretty done with making myself unhappy so that everyone around me doesn’t have to consider how I feel. That being said, I have had a lifetime to allow this to happen to me. My responsibility to myself is just that, mine. If I don’t speak up, assert myself or worse, throw myself under the bus to maintain the lane of lease resistance, I affirm my own willingness to put myself last. I have to stop this. NOW.